HyperVigilance

by Ellen Riggle

Enter a room

pretend bold

feel wary

wearing the unconcealable

Scan left

            to

Image credit: Baran Lotfollahi on Unsplash

                 right

                 right

            to

         left

again >  <

again >  <

Sniff the air

scan left

            to

                 right

                 right

            to

         left

calculate the odds

Look for faces of friends

friendly faces

faces of strangers

Known threat

unknown threat

unknown unknown

Move along the wall

always face the room

plan escape routes

Watch for eyes watching

eyes looking away

wait for their humanity to appear

Listen for the (un)holy

Do I know their God?

Does their God know me?

Focus

join a conversation

laugh, joke, smile

Look away

scan left

            to

                 right

                 right

            to

         left

Nod politely

breathe in

walk away

searching for sanctuary

***

Ellen Riggle

Ellen D.B. Riggle, PhD, is an award-winning professor and author with a semi-serious hiking habit. Their essays and poems are published in numerous outlets, including Does it Have Pockets, Earth's Daughters, Rise Up Review, and Writers Resist. They are author of over 100 academic articles, and co-Executive Producer of the short documentary, Becoming Myself: Positive Trans & Nonbinary Identities (available to stream on YouTube).